Chelsea (1999-2005)

by Hannah
(UK)

My cat was everything to me. She was a fluffy blue Persian and had the most loving nature about her. She'd follow me everywhere, sleep in my bed and since the age of around five and until the day she died, she was my best friend and still is. She used to come up to me when I was crying, play with me when I was happy, she knew my emotions. The day mum took her to the vet and we got the bad news, I was at my friend's house and my mum told me over the phone. I can still remember the agony I felt, the tears streaming down my face, knowing that she wouldn't be coming back home. "Why?" I thought. "Why Chelsea?" I thought again. She had been messing in the house for a few years and mum had got sick of it, she ended going to my dad's house for a year or so, before I pleaded with mum, so that I could have her back with me.

I was deeply depressed for the next couple of months and even now, thinking about her makes me sad. The next few years were hard, sometimes I'd cry for no reason or confide in people, who only told me that I'd "always remember her in my heart," which turned out to make the situation worse and I'd bawl my heart out more. Chelsea had to be put down due to bladder problems. She'd had them on the day we went on holiday and mum decided to leave her at home, before then, we had taken Chelsea everywhere with us. The problems started then. We had two chinchillas at the time and I got told that one of them escaped from it's cage and may have frightened her. I remember trying to ask mum (before all this happened) if she could come with us and being told that she couldn't. I feel incredibly guilty now and whenever I think back to that day, knowing that maybe if I had taken her with us, she would of still been here today. She died in March, I can't remember the day, I think I was too sad to note it down at the time. She was only six years old, soon to be seven, had she had reached the 28th of April, which was her birthday.

I never knew what it was like to lose your best friend, until that day. Even my friend couldn't stop the tears coming to her eyes and I knew everyone around me could sense that I was destroyed. Mum tried to buy me new games or try to talk to me about it, but I was too sad to talk. I didn't get to say goodbye to Chelsea, but in a way, I'm grateful I didn't get that chance. It could of made the situation one hundred times worse, had I been able to. Recently, the people next to us just happened to get a cat that looked exactly like Chelsea. It set me off (it made me sad to see a similar cat) and it did my mum. Anything that reminded me of her, just upset me and made me realise how much I wanted her back.

I'll never forget her and in 2007, two years after her death, I got a new cat and have four of them to this day. I know in the future, I'll suffer more heartbreak, but I believe Chelsea's death has only made me stronger. I just hope the four I have now lead long and very happy lives. I won mum over eventually and she got Charlie, who she loves more than anything. We then got Bailey in 2008, then Rio and Dinah, who lives at my dad's house and is currently lying on my lap as I type this. Mum was worried about me ending up in the same state again when these cats die, but you only live once and cats mean everything to me, I just had to have that feeling again when owning one. Of course, none of them will ever be like Chelsea, but they all have their own distinct little personalities, which I love them dearly for.

I miss you Chelsea. God Bless, my purrfect angel. I know she's in Heaven now with all the other cats that so many of you have lost. I'm very grateful for this site, it allows me to share a little story about a little cat. Thank you.