Cookie June 1997-November 2012

by Pal
(Canada)

Three weeks ago I had to have my beautiful cat put to sleep after suffering from a saddle thrombosis. The vet told me she had a murmur and at 15 and a half would not make a recovery. I totally fell apart and could not accept watching her die, even though I promised I would never let her die without me. I let my family talk me out of staying with her because I was so upset.

Though she had a wonderful life with a lot of love, I cannot get over not being there for her for the last minutes of her life. I feel so guilty. For 15 years we never left each others' side except for three days when I was in the hospital. My heart hurts and I cannot tell anyone how bad I feel.

My only positive feeling is that I believe we will one day be reunited, and I will one day hear her beautiful purr and her loving meows again. I still cannot sleep the night without reaching for her or stop crying when I see her pictures on my camera. Cookie was a precious gift from God and I will be for ever grateful that she shared my life.

Rest in peace, Cookie. I will never forget you. You took a piece of my heart with you.

Comments for Cookie June 1997-November 2012
True information is shared NEW
by: Fender

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RE: GUILT NEW
by: Anonymous

Ah my honey, i agree don't let guilt eat you up... you are hurting enough... It is 5 months TODAY since i lost my son, my heart aches for him. I have thought back and felt guilt over many things but as a dear friend told me... not sure if you have Jesus in your heart... she said that the guilt and 'bad mom' thoughts is the DEVIL at work... he loves to see you HURT ever more... sadly, we are human and prone to bad thoughts so i totally understand how u feel... i send you a HUGE hug dear heart xx
Heart NEW
by: Anonymous

Please, please, don't feel guilty. I know what you are going thru actual physical pain it hurts sooo much. My cat 6 years old died November 24, 2012 so I do feel your pain and know what your going thru. Remember all the good times you had with your kitty, you loved your kitty sooooo much words can't even say, but know that your kitty loved you sooooo much too. Your kitty is gone physically, but lives on in your heart and probably comes time time to visit you. Know that your kitty knows you are a good person and your kitty doesn't want you to dwell on guilt, you done nothing wrong. You are a good cat person and some day when the time is right for you, you'll open up your heart to another kitty with lots love to give, your kitty would like that cause kitties understand unconditional love.
I am so sorry for your loss. In time your heart will slowly heal, for each person it is different.
Keep an open heart, from one to another.
love
by: Anonymous

Don't feel guilty. All I see are those last moments! I feel I have been through traumatic stress syndrome. Going to go through it again when another cat is ill. But there's one thing this last cat has shown me: he knows how much I love him. So you need not worry, I know Cookie knew. Remember when she showed you.
my aching heart to yours
by: Anonymous

I lost my son 2 months ago tomorrow, the irony is that the 28th is my birthday. Suffice to say my heart aches and it certainly will not be a day of celebration for me. I snuggle with my child's blankets. I cannot tell you that time will heal dear, but thank the Lord that we can be here for each other since we truly understand the hurt we all feel.

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